Ideas. I am sure that we all have
come across an awareness that seemingly changes our perspective and how we move
through life. I had such an idea come to
me a couple of weeks ago while preparing to do a group facilitation in nearby
Boulder, Colorado. Prior to the meeting,
I was thinking about how I could best help these individuals as they searched for
what they wanted to accomplish in the next year. Now each facilitations is different from each
other; so while I was thinking about this activity, I was drawn to its purpose. But the more I thought about the purpose I
became more absorbed with the planning on how the event was going to transpire;
which led me to feel like I really had nothing to offer them. On my drive to the location, I had a concept
come to me; so, I presented it to them and it would eventually set the tone for
the event. I asked them not to think, “What are we going to do to accomplish
our mission?” but to think of the more basic question of “Why is our mission
important?”
The concept of “why” over “what” is
a simple one if we take the time to consider the difference. Oh sure, “what” is an action word that means
that we are busy doing “something”. We
may have started doing something based on a desire to accomplish a goal. But how many times do we continually do the
same thing over and over again without reflecting on why we are doing it. As I think about the meeting with the group
from Boulder, I remember not sensing that I left them with the best of feelings
and now I know why. I could feel that there
was a sense of frustration over their final collective decision and that was because
the action plan that they had chosen was the same one that they had chosen the
year before. My mistake was that I did
not reflect on the comment that I started the meeting off with. Instead of
allowing them to “sit” in their frustration, I should have asked them why this
act was so important to them. I should
have asked that they consider not “what” or “how” but to ask themselves “why”. The “why” will reflect their passion. The “why” will develop their truest identity.
There it is. The
concept of “why”.
Individually we ask ourselves, why
do we want to get a better education… or to be successful in business… or to be
faithful in our relationships… or to stand up for social justice? Is it just
because we know it is the right thing to do?
Well, we know that telling the truth is the right thing to do. We know that obeying the laws is the right
thing to do. We know a lot of “right thing” to do’s but yet we still don’t
always do them.
Now this is where the story becomes
a little more personal. I have asked myself the very same thing. Why do I write…
why is it so important for me to study how to be a counselor… why do I eat
healthy… why do I choose to work out the way that I do… why do I have the faith
system that I have?
So let me offer this as a
suggestions, when we are about to start a new phase of life or set a new goal, lets
first ask ourselves why we want to do it.
I believe that once we personally know the answer to “why” it will
become a lot easier to discover “what” we want to do and “how” we should do it.